" The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.
Lovers don't finally meet somewhere,

they're in each other all along."

From Essential Rumi

by Coleman Barks

A Few Poems


Please darling, remind me
- wasn't that you who said:
"There is no such a thing
as a throw-away intimacy"?
Let me guess what happened to ours
since we did not throw it away...
Did we suspend it like laundry
on the clothes line drying in the air?
Or did we put it on the highest shelf
at the back of the wardrobe
for a season when we need
something much lighter and care-free?

Maybe we stored it in the attic in the coffer
with baby's clothes and wedding gowns
for the next twenty-five years or so?

Did we recycle it by a mistake?
But that doesn't make any sense:
We wouldn't put into a recycling bin
a book of art to be processed into a paperback!
No, that's just a pure nonsense!

Oh what a predicament!
I am looking for it all over the place
and I cannot find it anywhere.
Yesterday it was here
and then suddenly it disappeared!

Please, sweetheart, help me look for it
because I know that I did not throw it away,
and I don't believe that you did,
since you think that there isn't such a thing
as a throw-away intimacy!

How can I describe the void
created by your absence?
A vast tall room with lights too bright,
where each sound echoes from the bare walls and floors
imitating life
my scattered thoughts gathered around the black gaping  hole
in my heart 

A glass dome around me not allowing others to come close,
afraid of my suffering, as if it were a contagious disease...
Leprosy of heart
Good people leaving crumbs of empathy,
glad they could aid without exposing themselves
to my pain,
they cannot cure or help.
So I am wandering aimlessly
carrying a clapper and a bell,
walking half-dead through purgatory on earth.

Too Much?

I think of the aura of you, and I miss you...
I think of your scent, voice and touch,
your beautiful mind and generous heart,
I think of the peace I find in your arms,
and I keep asking myself:
Is that too much for me to have it near by?
Don't I deserve to be loved every day,
instead of once a year?
Or is that too,
too much?

Precious Heart

If I were crying for a Tree’s love
the tree would weep,
would bind me in its branches and lift me to its crown
to rock me and soothe me;
my eyes kissed by its leaves .
If I were crying for Wind’s care
the wind would howl
its balmy breath would dry my tears,
and warm  my soul
whispering the words of love.
If I were crying for Ocean’s kindness
the ocean would moan
its waves would surround me and hold me tight
allow me to know its unknown.
If I were crying before a Mountain
the way I am crying for your love
it would come closer, lean over,
embrace me, and give me hope.
I have the whole wide World open to love
yet I have no strength to unlock Your Heart;
it seems to be as tough  as diamonds,
under heat and force hardened over time.
a walk on mt. royal

delicate wind stroking your radiant face
announcing spring on a gray winter's day
your funny hat with the strings I pulled
to touch your full lips
with mine
shy avid kisses on the cold bench
desire, joy and blind trust
in the wonderful  future in front of us
yours and mine
you and me
indifferent to the whole city spread at our feet
our being suspended
between You - I and Us
somewhere between the ground
and sky
inviting us to reach it
on immense white wings
of love

April-June 2010